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At the end of April Ryan and I took a 7+ hour road trip to head to Texas where he participated in his second full Ironman (more to come on that on Friday!) When I saw this Car Ride Q&A on Make Me Up Mia I just knew I wanted to ask Ryan some questions on our ride to Texas. Some of you may have seen his video on marriage and commitment so I thought getting him to share a bit more might be interesting!
I forgot to take a picture of us in the car-oops!
So here we go:
Cassie: What was the biggest change from dating to getting married?
Ryan: Living together. Instead of my life we started doing stuff for our life. Our house, our dinner, our family. (Being pretty independent I completely agree with this!)
C: What is the most important skill a couple should know and use?
R: How to communicate openly. This has two parts: one listening and one explaining. Either explaining in a way to be understood or making an effort to understand. Both people have to make sure they are doing their job. (We have also frequently talking about willingness and acceptance.)
C: What is the key to continue to have a successful marriage?
R: I that still is the open communication. (See above)
C: As a newlywed what was your biggest challenge?
R: This isn’t a good answer, but sleeping and getting sick. (Let me explain. Sleeping: I had an old queen mattress. It was a bit rough to sleep on as springs would poke you if you didn’t lay just right. I never had noticed since I slept in the middle but once we divided the bed for us both it became a huge issue. Bad sleep! Not to mention the one time I coughed in the middle of the night. I opened my eyes to see Ryan’s face right there! Oops! Once we moved out of the 450 sq ft apartment into our house we got a King bed that we love! Getting sick: I was teaching and Ryan worked in a cubicle. He was not use to being exposed to all the germs. We kept passing sickness back and forth and finally we had to resort to not kissing for weeks which was horrible! Now that I am not teaching it is much better!)
C: What is the best thing about marriage?
R: Being able to design a life with your best friend and the one you love. (My heart melted a little.)
So there you have it! A little male perspective on marriage! Our time on the road passed rather quickly in all honesty. I have said it before and I will say it again. I enjoy road trips a lot because I love the quality time I get to spend with Ryan! Hearing his perspective on marriage made it a little extra special this time too!
What was the biggest change for you from dating to being married?
Until Next Time- Truly Love,
Cassie
I loved getting Ryan’s perspective!!! You should do more posts like this!!
I think the biggest change for us was getting used to each other’s habits. This was especially tough for us because when we finally did live together [15 months after being married, thanks to college and the Marine Corps!], Matt was coming off of 7 months of deployment with all men, and I had never lived with anyone else except college roommates and my parents!
It was an adjustment FOR SURE, but we laugh about it now. 🙂
I am glad you enjoyed it Laura! I am wanting to do a post (maybe a video) of his perspective on how wives can support their husbands when trying to accomplish a large goal (in his case Ironmans). Yes, getting use to each others habits is a hard one! Ryan and I lived a lot of weekends together before we got married, due to traveling so we knew most of our. However, I was say that one is probably ranked pretty high up there for many!
Definitely the sleeping for me too! I’m a night owl and my husband is a morning person. We still struggle with making sure we let the other person sleep while one of us is still up.
Oh yes, Pam this is one that is hard for couples too! We try very hard to go to bed together to stay on the same routine. Luckily we both can get up pretty early. The thing is Ryan can function on less sleep than I can so sometimes wants to stay up later. Marriage is all a balancing act of give and take!
Cool interview idea and I really like the part about communication!
Communication really is key, Christina! I am glad you enjoyed the post. I plan to do some more in the future as well.
This is great! I need to do this with my husband on a roadtrip 🙂 Our biggest change was also living together. We didn’t until after got married and it took some getting used to. We live together well though! We just got married 7 months ago and we’re loving it! Oh! Another big change and I think the hardest is combining money and having to get someone else’s opinion before you purchase something. I’m 31 so I made my own decisions for the past 13 years!
It is hard Kelli going from a mindset that you only have to think about yourself to including someone else in all the decisions! One of those things about marriage that takes some getting use to. Congrats on being newly married! Continue to enjoy it! I hope we can be a resource for you 🙂
Marriage is the best! We are going on 17 years now. So nice to see a guy’s perspective, too!
Congrats Mary Ann for such a long marriage! To many more years for you two!
Love his answers, how sweet is he 🙂 Openly communicating, couldn’t agree more!