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Ryan and I am looking at each other. I want to cry. But no tears came. I told him I had done all I could do. I asked if baby was okay. I don’t remember any of his responses. Just the look on his face and his eyes. Truly, I don’t remember hearing the baby cry or if someone told me she was okay. I remember seeing several people around the baby working on her, but I could see her on the table and she was alive! All I wanted was for Ryan to hold me and have our baby on my chest. We held hands as the staff monitored baby and my doctor started to deliver the placenta. Finally, I told Ryan to go check on the baby and to take some pictures.
The doctor and Regina made a few statements back and forth about the shoulder dystocia as she delivered the placenta. Doctor asked me to give a little push. The placenta was out. They hooked me up to the routine after delivery Pitocin. Someone brought me our baby wrapped up in a blanket. I had a few moments of awe. Then sadness that her face was so bruised. Next, I caught the smell of this precious baby and blurted out, “She stinks!” (Sorry, baby girl if you read this later in life. But it is true.) Since Miss M was in NICU and I didn’t get to see her until the next day I didn’t experience fresh baby out of the womb smell. But this time I did and I am grateful for that.
Baby girl was wrapped up in a blanket because they needed to take her back to check her again. She scored a 9 at her 5 minute Apgar score so she was doing well! No broken bones. She was breathing well. She just had an awfully bruised face and busted blood vessels in her eyes. She was brought back to me where we were able to unwrap her to have skin to skin. We spent some time like this as they finished cleaning me up and cleared the room. When they handed her to me the first time and now again this time she felt so heavy. I knew she was a big baby!
As I held the baby we took some pictures and attempted to nurse but she wasn’t quite ready. I found out that they did not give me an episiotomy and that I had also not torn. I didn’t think I heard the doctor right and asked Regina for clarification. It was true and I couldn’t believe it. The few people who were still left in the room kept making comments about how big the baby was and were taking guesses. They couldn’t wait to weigh her to find out whose guess was the closest. After a bit more time with her they took again to do her measurements.
Ryan and I were watching from the bed as they placed baby girl on the scale. I saw the 9 pounds register and then watched the ounces keep creeping up. As it locked in at 9lbs 8.5oz I again blurted out something along the lines of, “Oh my gosh!” (Once we were in the recovery room Ryan asked me if I felt some kind of high or buzz because apparently I was blurting things out and saying things a bit more straight forward than I typically do.) Ryan shared he didn’t realize the first number on the scale was the pounds. He was just watching the second number so he saw it a 7.something and thought we had a smaller baby. Funny stuff.
Our second daughter was born February 4th, 2017 at 9:07pm at 9lbs 9oz and 21 3/4 inches long. We still had not made a final decision on her name.
It was a bit after ten at this point. I didn’t feel hungry yet, but knew I would be soon. I requested orange juice from the nurse and pulled a bar out of my bag. Ryan went out to get us some food after he held the baby. I wanted some chocolate milk. He returned with some Arby’s and chocolate milk. We ate our food, talked about the scary moments, cried some, and decided on our baby girl’s name. Here on the blog we will call her Little Sis.
Once we hit the two hour post-delivery mark I was stable and ready to be moved to our recovery room. They moved us over and we began to get settled for the night. Since Little Sis was so large they checked her blood sugar every 3 hours before each feeding for four times. Once she passed all those they would give her her first bath. Throughout the night they came to check her blood sugar and then we would nurse. Each time she passed. The next morning, on Sunday, she had her first bath. Ryan and I walked down to the nursery to see it take place.
Soon after she had her bath and was warmed back up we had a busy day. We had hospital photographers, social security people, pediatrician, my OB along with some family members stop by. We also had my friend who stayed with Miss M bring her up to the hospital. Then, another friend meet there to take Miss M on a play date.
When Miss M arrived at the hospital Ryan went to get her from the waiting room so that we could have a few minutes as a family of four. The first thing she noticed was that Little Sis was wrapped up in a ducky blanket just like one she had at home. We showed the baby to her. Then, we “exchanged” presents. Miss M had picked out a rattle for Little Sis and wrapped it up. So she helped unwrap it and give it to baby. Next, we gave her a present Little Sis had picked out for her which were magnetic tiles. We showed Miss M our family picture we had with us and the picture on the wall that she had drawn of our family. She asked to hold the baby. Ryan helped her on the bed with me and together we held the baby. Little Sis suddenly cried which scared Miss M. She said she was done and tried to crawl down. And then she cried. After that she was a bit back and forth with the baby and clingy to Daddy. It made me question how things would go when we got home.
Miss M left for a playdate. Things settled down for a bit. Ryan, baby and I spent a little more time together. He got us some food. That evening we decided it was best if he went home to stay with Miss M instead of another sitter. He left Sunday evening and came back Monday afternoon. We hung out for a handful of more hours before we were dismissed at 6pm on Monday. Little Sis did great in the car. Cried for a minute and then passed out. We came home to just in time for Miss M to welcome Little Sis home before it was her bed time. She was excited to have her baby home. She was excited that the baby was out of my belly and finally came. She was excited to give her kisses and hold her. We talked about asking Mommy and Daddy before picking her up and how we kiss Little Sis on the toes (recommended by our pediatrician to support less germs getting spread).
We were home. Another little human in our care to love and raise. Now a family of four. Four healthy and whole beings. I am still in awe at just how amazing and terrifying one experience can be. But how truly blessed I am!